CHANGE HAPPENS

So,  often times I think of things to write about while I'm supposed to be sleeping. The other night I was up thinking about my friends who, in my opinion, are practically being bullied by their boss. From there I started thinking about how hard it could be at times to change our current situations. For my friends,  of course, it's a lot easier said then done. They have families to help support financially, or are the sole provider for their household.

I used to work with them at the same office and I have an idea of some of the pressures they are dealing with. I can't say that I felt like I was personally bullied but I did notice first hand the foul treatment my co-workers received. I left for some of the same reasons they want to leave along with some of my own personal reasons. It takes courage to stand up for yourself. I don't always do this and the times that I haven't, I regret. I don't feel that it is always necessary to tell someone off but saying how you feel and perhaps why you are unhappy is important.

Deciding to leave a job for whatever the reason is not easy for most of us. That dreaded conversation with the boss! 

I remember the conversation I had with mine and I felt so intimidated. I felt like I was making a complete mistake at that moment on the phone even though the moment before, I was confident I was making the right decision. 

I was accused of making things really inconvenient for THEM. I was never asked why I was leaving. Never asked if there was anything they could do to keep me, or even told that they were sorry to see me go. Instead, it was all about what I was putting my bosses through, how inconvenient I made it for them. I was made to feel like I was the selfish one for wanting to pursue my own goals and deciding that this was not the place for me.

At first, I felt confused. I felt like I really was making it so hard for them and that I was being selfish. Then of course my supportive husband helped me get back to reality. I realized, especially at that point, just how much I needed to leave. My bosses were controlling. In my opinion it was almost verbal abuse how I was treated at the time I quit. Those next two weeks would be the longest. I was told not to tell the patients I saw that I was leaving, that they would tell them AFTER I was gone. Who knows what they told them. Of course I still told some and when they found out, I was reprimanded and told that they could get in trouble by insurance....I dont know, It made absolutely no sense! In the 7 months I worked there, I never called out. Yet, I was the selfish and unappreciative one. I didn't want to leave without saying how I felt, so I wrote an email to my bosses explaining just that. I'd say it was to the point,  yet respectful. I never received an apology, or even a response for that matter.  

Needless to say, I am happy I am out of there but Unfortunately, it was not an easy process.

It's taking a risk to decide to leave a job or do anything that in effect will actually change what you are currently used to, especially if its what you've known for a number of years. It takes being brave to say to yourself that everything is going to be okay if you make this decision. It takes believing that you truly deserve better then what you are facing right now.  It's important to think about others around you and how they will be affected, but it also at times just as important to get out of a situation that is not good for you mentally, emotionally or physically. It is often times after you make the choice that things start to become more clear to you. You begin to feel empowered. If you are being controlled and bullied by anyone, its probably in your best interest to do your best to get out of the situation. 

 I am VERY happy with my decision to leave my job. I don't regret it at all. I feel for the Ladies that are still there and are looking for their way out. Usually, when its the right time, you just know. 

I have always had a hard time dealing with change. Sometimes it is under my control other times its not. But Whether it is or isn't, sometimes  It just needs to happen. Instead of thinking the worst, Think of what you can learn from the change that is happening or that you wish to happen.  Change has taught me a lot about the person I am and would like to be. Change has made me more aware of my self esteem and helped me to be more confident in myself.  I suggest talking to those who know you the best and have your best interests at heart. 

In the meantime, stay positive, and know your worth!

Please understand that these are only my personal opinions based on my own expriences.

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Until the next time, 

always be creative & Thanks for reading

Lorin Janae~~

STRAWBERRIES & CREAM🍓🍓🍓

A poem I wrote November 08'

STRAWBERRIES & CREAM🍓🍓🍓

Let's get together like strawberries & cream

We can make a sweet combination

Everyone would wish they had what we have

You could be the cream

I could be the fruit

I'll make sure to stay ripe and sweet

My brilliant red color won't fade

And my juices won't dry

You can call me succulent

I could call you smooth

Your creaminess won't overpower me

Your flavor won't dominate me

I can be your compliment

We would be complete

Together, let's make dessert🍓🍓🍓

Lorin Janae~~

Thanks for reading!

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"STAY POSITIVE. IT TAKES TIME........IT WILL COME"

(10/17/12) 

What I would like to write about today is how I'm feeling depressed. I woke up this way and it has not gotten better all day. 

Despite wanting to write about this, I'm deciding to write about something positive. Something I'm working on is changing my negative thoughts into positive thoughts. So, instead of telling myself "I CAN'T do something, I'm learning to tell myself  " I CAN".

I tend to get overwhelmed and stressed out easily and lately I feel overwhelmed with trying to be a successful business owner. I decided to start my own business knowing it would be a challenge. I just really didn't know what to expect.

(10/18/12)

Please remember, that when I say successful, I mean able to appeal to people and help them with perhaps, chronic or acute, physical pain. I mean become a known and trusted source for the field of bodywork. Im not expecting or even trying to get rich. I'd like to make a decent living. 

 October 31st will be 5 months since I officially started my massage business. and I am Unrealistically expecting to be extremely busy. Yes, unrealistically expecting to have the phone ringing off the hook!

All day, everyday, I am in business mode.Thinking about what I will do next, Who I can call, What I can post on Facebook.........and it goes on and on. As a matter of fact, today I went to the gym with my husband to do a weight training workout. At the end of it he told me that there were times when I looked like the weights were too easy. He said  while doing a bicep curl,  I looked like I was thinking " hmm, I wonder who I can give my card to today? how may massages will I do this week?, Oh, maybe I can set up my business info at another local business" ..............I looked at him and I had to laugh in amazement! He was spot on! Don't get me wrong, my biceps & triceps hurt this very moment as I type this blog, but, wow, he was right! Does the man know me well or what?! ( how did he do that!) ....... Im obsessed with my business!

After pondering all the things I am doing for my business, I almost thought, "well, maybe I should do a groupon deal. People will call me and then ill be busier." It's true, these deals get people in the door. They'll give the illusion that my business is doing great, when in fact, its not. I worked for a company  who did groupons and Living Social deals and had lots of business. the phone wouldn't stop ringing! and in the end, that business is no longer open. While there might be some advantages to it, I don't see that they out way the disadvantages. At least not for me.

Business might be slow now but I still stand by my work as a Massage Therapist.  I absolutely love what I do! I know I give a great massage and that my work will speak for itself.  I bring color to the world of massage. I am an artist, a massage artist. I don't give half hearted massages. 

 Getting my name out there is tricky, but it will come. I understand now, even more than I did a month ago what it means when people say it takes time. It also takes patience, confidence, and persistence. Im learning a lot in the process. Staying positive is essential. If I don't believe or feel like my business will grow, then it most likely won't and that negativity will push people away. But, If I can visualize what I would like my business to be and focus on building that with positive thoughts, then eventually it will get there. I have determination to make this work. 

Im going to have my moments of being unsure and insecure. Its called being human and imperfect. In the meantime, I tell myself:

 "STAY POSITIVE." " IT IT TAKES TIME......... IT WILL COME."

Thanks for reading!...

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Lorin Janae~~

WHAT I LEARNED ABOUT MYSELF IN PUERTO RICO

This past summer, my husband and I did a lot of traveling. First, we went to Disney with my brother and sister in- law and two nieces to see Mickey & Minnie ......yay!!!!

We came home only to leave a week later to drive to Maryland then to Virginia for the 2012 "Safeguard Your Heart" convention. By this time, I was enjoying being away but soooo tired of packing and unpacking, figuring out what to bring and what not to bring. But guess what, about a week after returning from Maryland, we were on a plane for Puerto Rico!! I get to dance salsa and speak Spanglish! Lol!

This trip was planed about a year in advance for a family reunion. I had been so excited to go to PR with my husband, for the first time, together. I had been with his family back in 1998 and he had gone in 1999, but never had we gone together.

We arrived in San Juan late Friday night I think it was 11:30 or so. The night was beautiful. There were palm trees everywhere. The city lights reflected off the buildings and glass windows. I could see the shadows of the palms flapping in the air and it was all so surreal. I had a feelings inside of excitement to be with my husband in his family's homeland. I was flattered to be in Puerto Rico, yet I was also nervous, hoping I would fit in and feel comfortable with all his family. 

 From the moment we arrived to the time that we came home, we were with family. We reunited with cousins and aunts, uncles, grandmothers, and everyone in between. The family welcomed me back with open arms as if I had been a part of it all along. It was a good feeling. My husband was also in his glory. I could see how he missed his family, how he missed his life in Puerto Rico. It meant a lot for me to see him so happy. It was like he just fell right back into his roots even though he hadn't lived there since he was six years old. An emotional return for him.

This was not a luxury vacation, nor did I expect Ito be. Instead, it was simply about being with family.  We didn't stay in a hotel in the tourist area. We stayed In a no frills, apartment close to the family.

 For me, it was a life that I have never been used to or known. For Jayson, it was how life was and as if he never knew any different. 

 Traveling to PR was a lot different than most of our vacations. We usually relax most of the time and pretty much go with the flow of what we feel like at that particular moment. I love being alone with my husband and spending the time getting to know each other. We talk or don't talk but either way, we're ok with it. I enjoy being with my own thoughts. I like alone time or quiet time when I could relax and take in my scenery.

The memorable times for me, I'd have to say we're, the beach days, the rainforest, Old San Juan, the actual family reunion and of course the full on meals of rice and beans, hearty chicken soup, and pork at 2 am! Yes, there was no timeframe to when and how much was cooked! After a long day, we'd go back to the house and have a huge meal! For me, it's something to talk about because my mother is definitely not cooking at 2am! Not only were they cooking but the music was loud and the family was louder! I wondered if the neighbors would ever call the police on us, but I guess they were all used to that. I love the food, the music, the language and the  simplicity of things.

One of the days we went to a gorgeous beach on an island called Culebra. You could see through the water as if it were glass. There were small, clear,  white fish that would swim by us in schools. They looked like they had a grayish outline around them and that was the only way you could see them. Palm trees was the view beyond the water and it was absolutely breath taking. This was a scenery I NEEDED to take in. The time we spent on this beach was probably the highlight for me. It was no place I had ever been or could compare it too. The sand was soft and white and the sun was perfect. I wish I were there right now. I could imagine giving or receiving a massage, right there on th beach.

While I was happy for Jayson about being with his family, I must admit, I felt overwhelmed at times. It was a culture shock. I speak limited Spanish. Sometimes I understood what was going on, other times I was completely lost and the tones of all the voices became background noises for me.  It was all just so different for me on a large scale. My environment, the language barrier, where we stayed and even getting used to being with my family of another culture. 

 Before arriving, I was thinking I'd be okay because, I too, have a big family. My family is loud and loves to listen to loud music and dance and yea, they're pretty crazy too!  I had also been to PR  before so I thought I had more of an idea of what to expect. What I didn't think about was how I would actually feel being in the middle of it all. There were times when I just wanted to be by myself for a while. I wanted to enjoy the island from the beach, or sit on the porch and relax with my own thoughts. I found myself zoning out from the world around me and then feeling self conscious about it when I realized it. I didn't want to appear rude, bored or unhappy, because I was not. In fact, this trip helped me reflect on my own family. How much I love and chersh them. How much I appreciate them and maybe don't show it or say it enough.

Now, I realized that I may not really know a lot about my husband's Puerto Rican culture.  But what I do know is that his family is very close. They love each others company. All they need is a kitchen to cook, a radio to play festive music, maybe a few beers or bottles of vodka, and each other. 

There doesn't need to be any special  occasion to have a fiesta. There doesn't need to be fancy or expensive anything. 

All you need is your family. 

Thanks for reading!

Lorin Janae~~

BodyWise Therapeutic Massage

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IF I WERE A SEASON, MY NAME WOULD BE AUTUMN

This time of year always reminds of me of being a kid. I remember the back to school days and standing outside waiting for the bus. I was one of those kids who actually liked going back to school. Not because I was excited to learn, but because I was excited to see how many outfits I could make with my new school clothes.

Sometimes I wish my mother would take me school shopping again.  I would ask her for the most expensive pair of shoes, to match my new outfit. She would  say no and then I would somehow convince her that I just needed to have them. They are the latest and most fashionable shoes and no one else will have them because they are different and colorful and full of flare and character! 

Now that I'm an adult, I realize that I will most likely not be begging my mother to buy some new shoes, that hopefully, no one else will have. Instead I will be looking at he price and saying, "please, I ain't paying that much! They must be crazy! I'll  wait till they go on clearance."

Isn't it true that when you get older those things don't really matter to us anymore? Having the latest and greatest and caring how much it costs? Don't get me wrong, I still like to be fashionable and stylish. I just don't feel the need to break the bank over it. My husband, I'm sure will say I spend more than he thinks I should but I'm a girl.....(Excuse me, I mean I'm a woman)....the point is, clothes and shoes are always more expensive for us. ( maybe its the other way around but guys don't need to have as many choices as women, right?) 

Ok so now I'm ranting. This was supposed to be about the fall season. 

I love this time of year because the weather just makes me feels good. It's cool and crisp most days and the colors of the leaves and trees seem to be more brilliant than ever. Its a time of year that I just want to go outside and take a deep breath and take it all in. The air, the smells, the colors and the cool sky against the warm sun......It just feels good. (say that slowly while closing your eyes and taking a deep breadth, just feel it!!!) ummm, fresh, fall air.

I love fall fashion. Sweaters, boots, scarves and yes, who doesn't love a great fitting pair of corduroy jeans! Thats right, the kind you can't help but to glance at as you walk past the mirror! 

The truth is, Autumn is actually my favorite season. I don't like when it's cold but I love that I can throw on a sweater and some, "yea, I know they cute boots", and still look good without the big bulky coat. Fall just feels cozy and comfortable to me. 

What about you?

What's your favorite season and why?

Thanx for reading!

Lorin Janae~~

AKA, Autumn

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Why I won't do Groupon deals for my business

 As I mentioned, I am a Licensed Massage Therapist and now own my own practice. Every single day I see offers for facials, massages, reflexology, manicures & pedicures for half off or more. Im encouraged often by people I know to do a living social or groupon deal so I can get people in the door. While I agree it will bring many to my office, It is not an option for me. I feel these particular offers are great for the consumer and terrible for my business and my talent as an L.M.T.

Perhaps most people receive daily notifications or emails for groupon, living social, savect.com or whichever discount website you may have in your area. You can buy all kinds of goods or getaways for a great discounted price usually half off! I have purchased many things from groupon in particular. I admit, I LOVE a great deal! Who doesn't? 

So, why wont I jump on the bandwagon? I'll tell you.

Here are my reasons for NOT using this form of marketing:

1. I work hard at my profession as a body worker. I use my body and my hands to perform a quality massage. In this field, we have to preserve our bodies for the work that we do. To me that means taking the necessary steps to take care of myself which includes limiting the amount of massages I give in a day or in a week. The years that I may be able to do this work are limited. Therefore, I deserve to get paid the amount that I charge. What I charge is reasonable for my area. 

2. The promotions on these sites can  generate a high volume of customers. Usually 150 people or more. I have seen close to 400 purchases for some businesses. I don't want to feel overwhelmed with a lot of work that I may not be prepared to handle, not to mention practically GIVING away my services to possibly hundreds of people.

3. After only charging about 50% of my service and then paying the advertising site, I may only make out with about $16.00 per service, perhaps less. I still have to think about supplies, rent for my space, my time spent performing the service,  doing paperwork after each session, and any other advertising I decide to do. In the meantime, even after giving a quality massage, (1) I may not receive a tip (2) most who buy these types of deals from these sites, are only after a good deal and have no intention of becoming a return client. I have personally had people say to me they only look for the deals. Well, why not, there are so many to choose from!

4. It feels good to know that the people who visit my office are there because they trust my work and are willing to pay full price for a quality massage. Those are the ones who refer others to my office, who in turn come to trust my work and value my worth.

5. If I would offer 50% off or more for my services then why don't I just make those my regular prices anyway? The truth is, I would not be in business if I charged 50% 

less than I already do. I'm not up for devaluing my services.

6. I have had the bad experience of working for someone who did groupon and living social deals. I was busy the days I worked doing 5 or 6 massages per day but only being paid $9.00 for doing an hour session, even though I was contracting for 60% of what my boss was making. Some of the clients did not tip. I have yet to be paid for those two weeks of slaving. 60% is really good as a contractor but not when it's based off a groupon deal. I never thought it was fair and I left that job after two weeks. 

Right now I don't work for anyone and I don't have employees or sub- contractors to pay but the whole situation left a bad taste in my mouth, especially for those who do get paid based on commission. Usually, as a contractor you only make a percentage of what your client paid, no matter what they paid. I don't agree with having to pay for someone else's advertising. (but that is a whole other can of worms!)

So, how do I advertise? 

Well,  it is still a learning process but so far it's been word of mouth and a lot of other creative ways like Facebook or email blasts. I do believe in offering small percentages off my services especially if it's your first visit. I also give rewards for referring others to my office or for my regular returning clients. Whatever I do, groupon is NOT an option for MY business.

Owning and nurturing a business is a lot of work. So much so that I don't want to sell myself short by offering 50% off or more to hundreds of people. I don't criticize any other business that decides to advertise on groupon or other promotional sites. Perhaps for some businesses, Groupon, Living Social, or other similar sites might be the way to go. However, I feel it's in MY best interest not to. 

Thank you all for reading! 

Please share your thoughts or experiences! 

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~Lorin Janae~